Another Restless Millennial
Maybe at least one of you out there can relate to this.
I think a lot of us have aspirations as writers, thinkers, amateur coders, or in any other hobby or entrepreneurial career. The problem is that so much has already been written about, and so much has already been coded or developed. At this point, you not only have to unlock that magic formula for captivating your audience, but you also have to have something unique. So, I think my plan for this blog is to share finding my way through all of this. I'm going to try to be as transparent and open as possible. I want to keep everything real and honest because who wants to read something from someone inauthentic? There's already too much fake out there and not enough real.
Who am I?
That's a good question. I'm not a writer by profession, and I am by no means a topic expert on pretty much anything. The only thing that might make me stand out is the fact that I read about this stuff. How to write better, how to be a better reader, how to start your coding journey—these are just a few examples of topics I'm learning as much as I can about right now.
I'm 33. I'm married, I have a one-year-old daughter and two older stepchildren. I'm a 911 dispatch supervisor working the midnight shift in a populous county in my state. I try my best to juggle all of this, but with a history of anxiety and depression, it doesn't always happen. Combine hearing terrible things at work with mental health challenges and fatigue from a health condition, and some days, it's hard just to get out of bed.
But I have goals!
I don't want to work in dispatch forever. It's a wonderful job—I get to make a difference every day, I have county insurance and benefits, we earn a fair amount of PTO, and the pay is extremely good for someone without a degree. There's no other job like it. But it's a hard job. I've heard fathers screaming after realizing their young daughter has just been run over by a vehicle while riding her bike. I've heard heartbroken wives sobbing after finding their husband dead from a self-inflicted gunshot wound on a bench near their house. I've had to sit there while watching my officer being shot at during a routine traffic stop. This job has taken its toll, and I often wonder how many more years I can do this before the last piece of my deteriorating soul irrevocably dies.
I'm hoping to be able to leave one day. Unfortunately, my family cannot take the income loss, so I'm stuck for the time being. Feeling stuck is a bad feeling, but it's more than that. It's hard to leave a job that makes such a profound difference every day. But my family is important to me, and so is my mental health, which means eventually, this ride is going to have to come to an end. So I'm trying to better myself to pursue a job that I can fully enjoy and am passionate about.
I enjoy coding as a hobby, reading, and writing, although I'm not very good at it. I recently decided to go back to school to finish my Associate's Degree, which I gave up on to work full-time in my early twenties. I don't have a defined plan yet, but I have some ideas and feel optimistic about the future.
I have a restless longing to learn more, be more, and to live life to its fullest. I've been "asleep" long enough. It's time to make more of my life.
I hope to document my journey, despite not knowing where it will take me. I hope you will consider joining me.
Follow along with me! Or don't. That's the beauty of this. After all, you should only spend your time reading what is valuable to you.